A few days ago before New Year 2022, my brother’s friend told my brother that if he’s planning to start his New Year’s resolution of working out in the gym, he might as well just start in February instead of January.
Perplexed, my brother asked “Why?”. His friend then went on to explain that it is because in January, the gym is usually very crowded because many others also have similar goals to start working out in the New Year, hence everyone would be packed with aspiring fitness go-ers, hoping to either lose weight, gain muscles, or just to be healthy.
But unfortunately, just as for most New Year’s resolution, that excitement and enthusiasm started to dwindle down into oblivion…and as the weeks go by, the gym would be more and more empty.
I thought this was really funny, but also very true. Every New Year, we would normally come up with lists of goals that we want to achieve — save more money, lose weight, spend more time with family and loved ones, read more books etc. Being a (former) lowkey Type A overachiever myself, I would have this long list of goals that I plan to achieve every year. Some are sustainable, some are not; some are achievable, some are not. I usually divide my goals into 8 categories: physical life, family, spirituality, career, attitude/mindset, relationship, finance and intellectual.
I used to be worked up on my goals, hustling extra hard, going late nights putting all the hours. I was really laser focus in achieving them.
But this year, after all that I’ve gone through in the last few month and last year, I think it’s time for self-care. It’s time to be kinder to myself, and to live a more gentle life.
Instead of listing down a tonne of goals and resolutions to achieve and be obsessed about.
This year, I decided to have only ONE goal.
And that is — to live with intent. In other words, intentional living.
Intentional Living
Intentional living is a type of lifestyle. It’s about making a conscious attempt to live according to your values and beliefs — your thoughts, your words, your actions. Everything that you choose to think, to do and say has to be aligned to those values and beliefs.
One of my favourite quotes is by the American author James Allen, “Self-control is strength, right thought is mastery, calmness is power”.
How do you live an intentional life? These are a few ways I’m planning to do this:
1. Not do things for the sake of doing things
- Doing things because I want to, not merely because I have to, or because I’m forced to or just so I don’t feel left out
- Those activities and tasks should be aligned to my values and principles of freedom, autonomy, and unique individuality
This leads me to my next point, which is:
2. The Art of Saying “No”
- Saying “no” to projects that I’m not interested in
- Saying “no” to toxic relationships
- Saying “no” to being taken advantage off
- And start saying “yes” to freedom and autonomy
- Saying “yes” to personal care and well-being
- Saying “yes” to passion and creative project
- Saying yes if that makes me and the people I love happy
3. Question Everything
- Always asking questions, and not taking everything at face value or as a given
- Educating yourself and be curious about the world around you
- This art of questioning reminds me of “The Socratic Method” made famous by the ancient Greek philosopher himself, Socrates. This method involves questioning, dialogue and cross-examination
- And speaking of Socrates and “The Socratic Method”, I personally think Socrates is the epitome of living intentionally, together with his other Stoic philosopher counterparts.
So, while we’re at it, let’s talk a little about Socrates!
The Story of Socrates
Socrates was born in 470 BC and lived in Athens, Greece most of his life. It was during the Golden Age era, when Pericles ruled the country, and the people witnessed a period of rapid development and democratization.
Socrates was first a soldier, then he became a stonecutter before devoting his life full-time as a philosopher.
Even though Socrates had plenty of ideas, he usually didn’t claim to know anything.
“True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing”.
— Socrates
He inspired many philosophers and great thinkers alike after his death with is intellect, curiosity and inquisitiveness. He would trade sitting around having good conversation with people for meals and shelter. This was how Socrates made his living.
But although people were inspired by him, he also made a handful of enemies along the way.
He is known for his terrible hygiene. People would say he went everywhere without shoes, never bathed, never cut his hair, and not to mention he wasn’t very easy on the eyes to begin with.
He wasn’t a big fan of democracy, which was the political system back in Ancient Greece. He didn’t care about money or status like the Athenians did back then. And he loved asking questions, like A LOT OF QUESTIONS, to a point where it annoys everyone because he made them feel stupid for not knowing the answer, or they were angry because he just wouldn’t leave them alone.
Socrates was the kind of person who would go to the streets and pull out some random person, asking them random questions like, “What is justice?” or “What is virtue?”.
One of the reasons why he did this was because he wanted to tackle ignorance. He even famously said, “There is only one ‘good’: knowledge, and one ‘evil’: ignorance”.
He forced Athenian politicians and social elites to question their own truth and publicly embarrass them. He even did it to judges or prestigious generals or government officials. But he didn’t care if people liked him or not. His main goal wasn’t to make friends. It was to help others discover how little they knew and get them on the path to truth.
Socrates Put On Trial
In 399 BC, Socrates was charged for not believing in the Athenian gods and for corrupting the youths with his ideas. Thus, he was sentenced to death by consuming hemlock poison.
Plato, another famous ancient Greek philosopher and a student of Socrates, also chronicled everything that happened during Socrates trial in his work “The Apology”.
But although it was called “The Apology”, Socrates didn’t apologize for anything. He refused to beg mercy for his life. He was all about doing the right thing, and not about trying to get acquitted.
His main focus wasn’t on defending the actual charges, but mostly he defended the way he carried himself. For example, for not bathing, not caring about the typical things Athenians cared about like money or status, why he questioned people about their beliefs and embarrassed them. He actually went so far as to tell the Athenians they should be thanking him for all this questioning he has bestowed upon them.
Reflection
Socrates was consistent with his principles throughout his lifetime. He was one of the first philosophers to ask, “What is a ‘good’ life?”. In his opinion, a “good life” is having a “peace of mind” as a result of doing the right thing, as opposed to doing things simply because society tells you its a good idea.
He didn’t agree with his peers at that time (such as Protagoras and most of the sophists) who believed in the theory of relativism, which claimed that morals were relative. Socrates, however, believed morals were absolutes and they apply to everyone in the world the same way, regardless of what country or time period they are from.
He thought that life, when you’re on Earth, is not just some preparation for what happens after death. He thought there was a whole set of tasks and problems to tackle when you’re on the planet, for example our thoughts, doing self-reflection and striving to live a virtuous life.
He was a philosopher who seriously and sincerely engaged in trying to know, understand, and work out the best kind of life. And he does this by thinking, discussing, finding out, challenging and reflecting. In short, he was a thinker committed in achieving clarity and to discovering the truth if possible.
He believed that the key to living a good life was understanding these virtues. Virtue was the best and most important trait to have. He thought that no one desires to do evil if we know they are evil, because that knowledge would make humans uncomfortable, and humans all strive by their nature to be as comfortable as possible
His most famous saying was when he was defending himself at his trial by saying, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” He thought that if you were a person wandering aimlessly in life, not questioning anything, or why you believe what you believe, he claims that type of life is not worth living. To Socrates, pursuing knowledge was the ultimate goal in life. It isn’t because it is entertaining to us, but it’s because it is the reason of why we exist.
From the time when we were babies, we act as information sponges, constantly trying to learn more and gather skills that will make surviving later in life easier. For some reason, however, at a certain age some people just stop. They’re perfectly content with the knowledge they’ve gained thus far and just call it a life.
But Socrates takes it one step further, and that is why I admire him. He said that knowledge is supposed to help your soul. He thought the unexamined life makes the soul dizzy and confused, whereas the wise soul is stable. By not seeking truth, you are harming your soul and by pursuing it you are nurturing your soul.
When I think about all the people in the world that I admire: Oprah Winfrey, Howard Schultz, Warren Buffett, and now my new idol Yanis Varoufakis, I realize I admire them because they have a belief and strong conviction in something. They go full on towards it, despite the mainstream idea of that time. And for Socrates, he held his beliefs and principles even after death.
Is there anything you are passionate about that you’d do for free? Is there anything you believe in so deeply, that you would die for it?