About Dr Christal - christalasong.com

Hi, I'm Dr Christal 👋🏻

Some of you might know me from my Youtube channel and blog as the doctor who decided to take the unconventional medical route and venture out on her own path…

You might be familiar with my story, but for those of you who are new…

Let’s start from the beginning, shall we?

Humble Beginnings

Born and raised in a small town called Bintulu, Sarawak with an average population of 200,000 people, my life was pretty comfortable. I grew up with the same circle of childhood friends, brought up in a typical middle-class family and surrounded by people with a similar upbringing.

My childhood was filled with fond memories.

I remembered in 2002 when I was 7 years old, I used to hang out with my family in the garden outside our house. Every evening after school, we would have teatime and my mum would make us all a hot pot of black tea with some titbits to munch on. Afterwards, my brothers and I would play some sports – usually either football, badminton, or ping pong.

Sometimes, my parents would organise a mini talent show where my brothers and I were made to pick a song and sing in front of them (my go-to song was anything by Westlife, of course).

The camaraderie we had, the laughter we all shared. Simpler times, yet joyful and fulfilling.

As a little girl, Christmas was an occasion that I’d look forward to every year, because it meant going back to my kampung (village) and playing with all my cousins; it meant slumber parties and receiving gifts from Santa Claus (a role happily played by my uncles); it meant listening to ghost stories and stealing keropok (potato chips) from my grandparent’s shop at midnight.

My kampung is located in the interior parts of Miri, Sarawak, in a district called Baram. Not many years ago, our kampung was only accessible by express boats or four-wheel drive vehicles due to the unfavourable, muddy terrain. Thanks to advancing development, the roads have progressively improved and now, even some sedans can be found in sight heading towards villages.

Visiting my grandparent’s orchard by boat and picking up various tropical fruits such as durians, bananas and rambutans were common activities for my brothers and I as kids. My first swimming lesson was by the river. I remembered smearing our bodies with dampened, slimy mud by the riverside and treating ourselves to some organic mud spa.

Those were the days.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

However, even at a young age, I used to wonder what might lie beyond the borders of this place that I have been confined in. Could there be more to life than this? Deep down, I knew there was something bigger out there, although I didn’t know what exactly at that time.

At around that age was also when my parents started introducing me to the concept of ‘how the real world works’, ‘the working life’ and ‘what it means to be an adult’. They began asking me the million-dollar question every child gets asked at some point in their lives, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

I remembered during primary school, I would record my dream occupation in my report card, and every semester, it would change: policewoman, stewardess, teacher, pilot, engineer, architect etc. But one occupation was consistent every year, and that was ‘doctor’. Why and how it happened, I have no idea. How would a 7-year-old know? No clue. Probably it was because that was a socially acceptable answer? Could it be something my parents have subconsciously drummed into my head? Was it because of the glitz and glamour doctors were usually portrayed as from the shows I watched on TV?

I came across this funny meme on the Internet that talks about career choices most Asians would usually opt for, and it says:

Asian Career Options:

(1) Doctor;

(2) Lawyer;

(3) Engineer;

(4) Family Failure

The last part cracked me up because of how accurately true it is, but it doesn’t come without consequences as well.

Becoming A Doctor

Since young, I have always been naturally curious and inquisitive. Hence, it was no surprise that I was also studious and did extremely well academically. As a result, all my teachers, friends, relatives and even parents would tell me, “Christal, you’re a smart girl. You get all As in your exams, ranked top in class. Why don’t you become a doctor? You can help others, plus it makes a lot of money too.”

If you’re smart and perform well in school, it’s only fitting that you become a doctor – that was the mantra back then (still rings true today).

Being young, I didn’t know any other career options. And the prospect of being a doctor sounded intriguing.

So from then on, I made it my mission to become one.

I worked my way up through primary school, secondary school up until foundation, aced all my exams and finally in 2015, I got accepted to pursue my medical degree in University of Malaya.

5 years later, I graduated and successfully achieved the very thing that I’ve been striving for my whole life – to become a doctor.

Then in 2021, I got called to do my housemanship (junior doctor) in Serdang Hospital. I thought to myself, “It’s finally here! The time has come for me to put my medical school training into practice and serve my patients.” I was elated.

I was elated.

The first few months of housemanship were amazing. Even though the hospital environment was very hectic – people running here and there, doctors ordering this and that, patients demanding so many things, lots of notes to key in, documents to settle – despite the chaos, I find it very exhilarating.

In the first few months, I was determined to do my best, to be of service not only to my patients, but to my fellow colleagues as well.

Unfortunately, reality was not how I’d imagined it to be. Within just 4 months into housemanship, I experienced a severe burnout. I was working 16 hours a day. I would wake up at 5am and go to work when the sun is not yet up, and then go back at 9pm, when the sun is already down. So I’ve never seen daylight, basically. We only had one off day per week, and I used the off day to just sleep for the entire day, to catch up on my beauty sleep that I’ve been deprived of.

I could see that even my peers and bosses were struggling to cope with the work demands. They were stressed out, miserable, unhappy and always complaining. But it seemed like they had to just soldier on and persevere because they had no other choice. And then suddenly it dawned on me, “Is this how my life will be for the next 30 years until I retire? What have I put myself into?”

Every day, I was literally dragging my feet to work. Each task felt like a chore. It’s ironic because medicine is a study about life, but deep inside, I felt lifeless, just going through the motions like a zombie sleepwalking through work. Medicine is also a study about humanity, but the workload, working hours and work culture is just inhumane in and of itself.

But being a doctor had always been my childhood dream. For my entire life, I had worked my way up for this moment to arrive – to become a doctor. And now that I’m here, it felt like the fairy tale dream I had in mind was nothing more than a disappointing illusion.

And then suddenly, this scary question popped up, “Should I quit my job?”

I’ve been working for the past 10 – 15 years for this, and to find out that it’s the wrong career? Does it mean I’ve just wasted my whole life? It was terrifying.

It took me many months to answer that question. Coming from a small indigenous community in Sarawak, I was being put on a pedestal because for us, being a doctor is deemed as the pinnacle of success. So at that time, I felt like a lot was on the line for me. If I quit this career, my family, my future and self-image would then be jeopardised.

Then, I thought about my parents. I can see that whenever my parents introduced me to their friends, their faces would beam with pride – and that was all a daughter could ever ask for. I just wanted my parents to be happy and proud of me.

As a child, I was raised in a beautiful household where I was taught about the importance of hard work and success, albeit that definition of ‘success’ was somewhat misconstrued. I used to think success was about achieving, hustling, competing, chasing and having a title in front of my name. And as a result, I went on a spiral loop that never seemed to end. Nothing was ever enough – including myself.

But I realised that when you live your life according to someone else’s expectations, you have to pay the price – and the cost is your own happiness. I had to learn it the hard way.

Growing up, my entire identity revolved around what I did – my school grades, the university I studied in, the course I took, my career as a doctor – but never about who I am as a person.

As a doctor, I instinctively knew life was meant to be lived in a bigger way, rather than being trapped like a prisoner within the four borders of the hospital walls.

Dark Night of the Soul

From that moment forward, I started to go on a deep soul-searching quest to figure out what I should do with my life.

I started asking myself some deep and brutally honest questions:

“What do I really want for myself?”
“Am I doing this for me, or for others?”
“Is this my choice, or someone else’s?”
“What will my parents say?

What will my friends think about me?”
“What will my future look like?”
“How will I support myself?”

And then, one day, I suddenly reached a tipping point where I just told myself, “Enough is enough”. I can’t be living someone else’s dreams, or someone else’s idea of what life should be. It’s time to take control, take accountability and really live my own life”.

And that was exactly what I did.

The 15th of December 2021 was my last day working as a doctor. I took off my stethoscope that had been hanging around my neck like a noose, walked out the door and left the hospital for good.

The Video That Went Viral

After resigning from housemanship, I made a commitment to myself that I will not let my decision to quit go in vain. For many, I would be seen as a failure. Some would even call me weak. Others would say I have wasted my entire five years of medical degree.

Even up to this day, people still question me for quitting my job, saying that I have wasted years of study. They’d ask me, “Where did you study medicine?” “University of Malaya”, I’d reply. “Wah, so sayang you quit! (Wow, what a waste that you quit!). Top university some more!” they’d exclaim.

But I wanted to break that chain of limiting belief. Deep down, however, I knew I was so much more than the job titles that I had been endowed, or the roles that I play in this societal game.

I noticed that there weren’t a lot of resources about life after leaving medicine. Perhaps it is because in our society, quitting a medical career is a taboo. It is seen as a humiliation, something to be ashamed about. So, I knew it was time for this cycle to end.

One day, I decided to share my entire journey of leaving my medical career on YouTube. Once I hit ‘Publish’, I didn’t expect anything much from it afterwards.

But I was surprised when the video received a lot of engagement. Many reached out to me personally through social media, telling me about their struggles in housemanship as well, and asking for my advice.

I tried my best to help every person, however, I couldn’t help but notice a common pattern among these stories: fear. And sadly, fear is the biggest culprit holding many people back from pursuing their purpose.

That was when an idea suddenly popped up in my head 💡

Creating Awaken Academy

I realised an opportunity: Many doctors are unhappy in their careers, and are desperate for a way out of the misery. However, they don’t know what to do or where to go. After all, medicine is all they have ever known.

Furthermore, leaving a reputable profession comes with undesirable repercussions, such as stigma and judgement for not living up to societal expectations. As a result, for fear of the backlash, many remain trapped in a job they don’t like, and living a life of dread day after day – situations I can totally relate to.

That was when I started Awaken Academy – an academy for doctors who are burned out, confused and seeking alternative career pathways to unlock their inner potentials and discover work they are meant to do.

Most career advice out there is about how to apply to different jobs, but rarely about how to decide what to do in the first place.

In full PPE as a houseman working in a COVID-19 hospital.

Got accepted to do housemanship in April 2021.

With another fellow local author, Dato' Medan Abdullah.

During my TTT certification training.

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Read an excerpt from my book 'Should I Quit' during my book launch in Eslite Spectrum bookstore.

With fellow colleagues who have the same mission to transform the medical industry.

Got invited to be a panelist for Astro Awani.

Me during my last day as a houseman on 15th December 2021.

Got invited to speak about my housemanship journey during Pustaka Miri Book Fair 2023.

During my official book launch in May 2023.

With fellow peers who also left their conventional medical careers, and currently successful in pursuing what fulfils them.

So I crafted a curriculum about self-discovery, self-awareness, self-knowledge, career transition tips – all of which are necessary if we were to identify what kind of work suits us and where our purpose lies – and delivered them through my training workshops and personal coaching.

I even got invited to speak in interviews and on stage about my journey and how I navigated through it all.

In May 2023, I achieved my childhood dream by publishing my own book, sharing about my personal story, newfound wisdom, insights and practical tips on how to know what work you are meant to do, so you can live your purpose.

Breaking the News to My Parents

When I told my parents I wanted to quit my medical career, they were not in the slightest bit happy with the idea. Their only daughter – the first doctor in the family, their pride and joy – now wants to quit this prestigious and lucrative career. It is every parent’s worst nightmare. They tried their best to talk me out of it:

“It’s only two years, hang in there.”

“You’ve studied five years for this, don’t waste it.”

“You’ve always wanted to be a doctor. What happened?”

But when they realised their efforts were in vain, they finally decided to let me walk my own path. They gave in, and gave me the autonomy I’ve always wanted, and promised to support whatever decision I will make.

Since then, I realised that the people we love usually try to stop us from pursuing something, not because they think it’s a bad idea. More often than not, it’s because they just don’t understand it. Why are you doing that? What’s going to happen to you? How are you going to survive? You are entering into a realm that is unfamiliar to them, and they are afraid of your safety. Their intentions are pure – because they love you and want to protect you.

And sometimes, all it takes is to just let them into your world. Share with them your dreams. Paint for them a picture, and let them see what you see. Make them a part of your journey.

Now, my parents are my strongest allies and number one supporter. They continue to believe in my pursuits, and cheer me on in everything I do. They are just a phone call away whenever I need someone to talk to. I know they have my back, and I can always count on them. For that, I am eternally grateful.

Your Life Purpose Is Your Responsibility

Ultimately, your purpose is your responsibility.

The old model where we put people into boxes, like we did in schools, religion, politics or workplace, is misleading and is becoming obsolete. Once you have a sense of your ikigai, your responsibility is to embrace it. Not everyone is going to bend over backwards to realise your purpose — not your parents, boss, teachers or even spouses. Hence, it’s up to you to make the changes that you want to see in your life.

You are here on Earth to play your part and fill your distinct role. And your greatest task is to uncover your story — your Hero’s Journey — and stay true to it, act from it, and share it with the world.

As the old saying goes, “The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second-best time is now.” So, plant your seeds now, and as you grow, your seeds will too. Life circumstances and setbacks may come knocking at your door. At times, you have no other choice but to attend to them. Nevertheless, always have in the back of your mind, your intentions to pursue your purpose and fulfil your ikigai.

Before I end, I’d like to impart this one last message for you: Things will unfold at its own divine timing — only if you allow it.

We have been so programmed to force or push things to happen. “We have to achieve this, by this age…we need to make this amount of money, by this year…we need to reach this position, by this quarter”.

And when certain plans don’t turn out the way we want, we get upset and discouraged.

Remember: Everyone’s journey is unique, everyone’s pace in life is different. You’re not late. You’re not early. You’re very much on time.

So learn to balance between the need to control, and letting things flow naturally. Follow your bliss, have faith for what’s to come, trust in divine timing, do the work, surrender the results, and don’t forget to have fun along the way.

My journey to get to where I’m currently at hasn’t always been a linear, predictable path. Quitting my medical career has been one of the biggest and hardest decisions I have ever made. Nevertheless, I have learned so much from that experience.

I went from being a burned out, confused and frustrated doctor, to now – fulfilled and living my life’s purpose.

Today, I’ve never been happier, and I want to help you do the same.

Today, I've never been happier, and I want to help you do the same.

Hope to see you around,

CHRISTAL ASONG